Alien invasions are a bad thing, as a general rule. Our notoriously porous borders cause all kinds of problems for the U.S., from aspiring terrorists who slip in to form sleeper cells to illegal immigrants whose cheap labor costs us plenty in the long run.

Plus, our lax borders make CNN’s apoplectic populist Lou Dobbs play like a broken record with his “Broken Borders” segments, which take precious air time away from my favorite Dobbs refrains: “Exporting America,” “Assault on the Middle Class,” and “Red Star Rising.”