Yoga. Bunny. Detox. Liquid Psychiatry. No nasties. My soft drink promises an awful lot. Perhaps I've discovered some sort of miracle beverage? Made from the sweat of yogis, infused with pure bunny, guaranteed to drive all toxins from your body on contact. I prepare myself, take a small sip, and discover a whole new flavor that can only be described as... ginger ale?

Shortly after taking office in 2002, Mayor Michael Bloomberg instituted New York's highly controversial Panini Laws. These statutes compelled all deli owners to reserve at least 1/3 of their counter space for "the production and sale of Paninis, as defined in Article 2." Paninis are officially defined as "a flatish, hard bread, kind of like a stale pita, stuffed with leftovers and made palatable by grilling with cheese."

Pasta, the staff of life. They say it's bread, but I don't think so. Does bread come in over 350 shapes, colors and sizes? Does bread have never-ending sauce options? Can you eat bread alone every single night? Maybe, but I'd bet you'd rather eat pasta.