As part of our Conscious Parenting: The Next Level [0] efforts, we’ve chosen to use some tools and ideas from a great book called Living Simply With Children [1]. One of the first things it calls for is having a family brainstorming meeting to define what is important to your family, so that you can create a Family Values and Vision Statement to live by. The only problem is, until you have attained a simple life it’s really hard to find the time for a family meeting! But we finally did over dinner, and here are a few snippets from the meeting. I’m paraphrasing the questions I’ve included, which are far greater and more thought provoking than I can include here. I should note that this experiment, though wholly supported by our resident existentialist Hova, was difficult for him, and Georgia got a little distracted, but had some very sweet answers.
Belinda: What does life look like if you live with no regrets?
(Silence.)
Belinda: OK, I’ll start. I always feel like I stop myself from being as generous as I’d like to be, and I’d like to be as kind and generous to people as my instinct tells me to be.
Georgia (hand up): I know! When we go to the pet food store I really want to buy our cats treats, but I forget.
Belinda: You are very generous to them, you hardly ever forget cat treats.
Georgia: Well, sometimes I forget.
Belinda: So you’d like to be more mindful of the cats. OK. I know I’d like to have more time for fun.
Georgia: Mmm hmmm!
Hova: More time to think.
Georgia: Although do you mean for work? For what?
Hova: I’d like my work to be part of my life.
Georgia: You can think of all the things you want to think at breakfast, or right after breakfast! What’s next?
Belinda: What are people meant to do here on earth?
Georgia: Doing stuff, helping the earth, living and doing what they want!
Belinda: Can everybody do what they want all the time?
Georgia: Well, not kids, 'cause it’s really up to the parents what the kids can do. Can I sing along in the background while we answer questions?
Belinda: Oh, please do! Hova, can you help out? You said you were with me on this.
Hova: To help each other, love each other, take care of each other. [2]
Georgia: (Playing air guitar) neh neh, nee! Needle needle neee!
Belinda: Is that just our family?
Hova: Every man, every woman…
Georgia: The whole world!
Belinda: That’s a big job! What matters to you most?
Georgia: My parents, and kissing them and hugging them and eating with them and being with them always, neeee, neeeaar, neee, neeeear (more air guitar).
Belinda: I would say family too, in a way that I never could have known before, family is really sacred to me.
Hova: Me too.
Georgia: Nee, neeear, neeee, neeear! How many can we say?
Belinda: As many as you want, we’re brainstorming.
Georgia: Animals and petting our cats! Der der der der, neh neh neh, der der der der, neh neh neh!
Belinda: What are families for?
Hova: I think families are for support and…
Georgia: Love?
Hova: Love, exactly, to keep things going, to keep a connection going.
Georgia: Comfort!
Belinda: Yes, families are for comfort. What makes us happy?
Georgia: What gives me the most joy is art! And my parents. And my friends. And a smile on everyone!
Hova: Laughing.
Georgia: (Hysterical peals of false laughter.)
Belinda: Dancing, being with my family.
Georgia: Having dinner makes me happy.
Belinda: Dinnertime is precious to me. I like to be able to sit down with my family and talk.
Georgia: YES! I know! I know one! MUSIC! Neh, neh, neh, neh, neh!
Whew! That went well... And now I have all those guitar solos on tape! So the next step is that as family secretary I will tally up the key words and ideas and we have another meeting to see what we want to focus our lives on and what we might want to change. Given that it took us three months to get this meeting underway it might take awhile to get to the next part. But that’s where we’ll fine-tune our values and put them into a Values and Vision Statement, which, I hope, will help us in our quest for greener, simpler living.
Photo credit: centralasion [3]