I recycle. I tote my reusable bags to the grocery store. I turn out the lights when I leave the room. I take mass transit. But the stack of celebrity magazines on my coffee table and hours of TV that I log? Well, that would probably prompt Al Gore to make another Academy Award-winning movie. Hey, I'm trying.

Welcome to Celebrity Planet, where each week we look at what celebs are doing to be environmentally conscious, which is sometimes a lot and sometimes absolutely nada ... kinda like the frequency with which Matthew McConaughey wears shirts.

Let's get to it...

Julia Roberts is an overachiever. Huge paychecks, three kids, hot husband... and she tells Vanity Fair her "dream" is to grow her own food, cook it, compost it and grow more. Suddenly my signature Thanksgiving apple pie, made with fresh store-bought apples grown by someone else, is like boxed Entenmann's.

Julia also talks diapers: "I was turned on to the [plastic-free, flushable] gDiapers ... I'd recommend them overall. It's flushable, but you've got to stir that thing! If you don't really break it all the way up, it doesn't go all the way down." $20 million bucks a movie and she doesn't have a personal flusher? What a, um, waste.

With the TV writers on strike, you'd think a group of environmentalists are filling in over at NBC. The network is celebrating "Green Is Universal" week and they've incorporated environmental plotlines into their prime-time shows. Nobel Peace Prize winner Al Gore has a guest gig on 30 Rock and the models on Deal or No Deal are wearing dresses made from recycled parachutes. Hmmm... that makes me wonder: How many Deal or No Deal models do you think it would take to change an energy-saving lightbulb?

While David Beckham's soccer career with the L.A. Galaxy has been a bit of a bust, he still deserves cheers because he and his teammates raised $100,000 for the victims of the California wildfires. So nice... but I can't help but wonder what Victoria Beckham's clothing budget averages out to each month. Me thinks it takes a lot of cash to stay so Spicy.

Lastly, Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria Parker was snapped at LAX carrying her pillow and the popular FEED Bag, which was designed by Lauren Bush for the UN World Food Programme. Am I the only one who sees irony in the fact that all the skinny Hollywood stars are carrying bags that say FEED across them? Someone should grab a marker and write "Me" below.