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Me, Worry?
Posted by Kim Steckler on February 28, 2007 - 7:13am.
I like to think of myself as a fairly introspective and self-aware person, and so when a few readers have commented along the lines of "stop worrying so much" I had to take a step back and ask myself, "Am I?" This certainly isn't the first time I've asked this question, but usually on matters Hayden-related the answer—if not from me, then from David—is a resounding, "No!"

With Cheerios, I had to balance the issues of health and safety. Ultimately, I felt safer sticking with Cheerios to eliminate potential choking risks, whether real or imagined. But normally, the only concerns that I need to weigh are health and time, or health and money. So David and I have been pretty neurotic, as the naysayers claim, about erring on the side of caution.

Take Hayden's nursery, for example. We were extremely fortunate to have the offer of a perfectly good, well-maintained crib from my sister that I was perfectly willing to accept. Cribs are mighty expensive, and that was a big-ticket item that I was grateful to save money on. But David, in a show one-upmanship with Research Girl, had been reading up on crib construction. And when he learned that most are made from medium-density fibreboard (MDF), a very sturdy type of hardboard made from layers of wood fibre and glue, he became really concerned about any potential formaldehyde that could be released from the glue. Nothing other than an $800 solid maple crib would be acceptable for his baby, he decided. I freaked. Not only was $800 a lot of money, but how was I going to explain to my sister that a crib that was good enough for her kids wasn't good enough for mine?

Never mind others, even I thought David was being paranoid to the point of unreasonable. I might even, in a heated moment, have accused him of "taking things too far." But he stood his ground—something he does so infrequently that I have to sit up and take notice when he does—insisting that there was a difference between being paranoid and well-informed. And that he was willing to make sacrifices elsewhere (i.e, no new digital camera, fewer dinners out) so that we could afford to pass up the free crib for the expensive one. The free crib, we agreed, would go to my father's house for occasional sleepovers there. This was a compromise that I could accept, but one that I could easily understand others choosing not to make. Compromise swings both ways, I guess.

<em>Pupper</em>'s picture
Just Curious
by Pupper on February 28, 2007 - 10:21am
If money and your sister's feelings hadn't been issues, would you have thought your husband was being unreasonable by wanting the maple crib? Do you think his concern about the formaldehyde was legit?
<em>inaiyana</em>'s picture
I UNDERSTAND
by inaiyana on February 28, 2007 - 5:40pm

hi,

 

my daughter is 18 months and from birth has always slept on her tummy. this is how she likes sleeping! also it stops them from getting flat head syndrome, look at most babies who sleep on their backs, they have flat skulls. i am in the process of writing an article for my website www.home-schooling-uk.com which will be posted on there on the 02/03/07 if you want to find out more about this.

as for the cot - i have an organic cot with an organic mattress and the whole thing came to over £300. not sure how much that is in dollars but i say its definitely worth it. i dont think your husband was unreasonable, it is heart warming that he was concerned about your babies health and that this made the money issue no issue! thumbs up

virginia


<em>inaiyana</em>'s picture
ps
by inaiyana on March 1, 2007 - 4:06pm
<em>ksteckler</em>'s picture
Of course!
by ksteckler on February 28, 2007 - 9:58pm
I absolutely think the concern was/is legit...I wish the decision(s) could always be as straightforward as that. But I'm glad that he stood his ground. 
<em>Luck_Factory</em>'s picture
relative risk
by Luck_Factory on February 28, 2007 - 11:44am

the bumpers tied up on the side of the crib are probably a bigger hazard than the formaldehyde.

and, flip that kid onto his back!

 

Luck Factory

http://www.luckfactory.com


<em>Vicki_R</em>'s picture
Relax
by Vicki_R on February 28, 2007 - 12:36pm
It's your first baby.  If you decide to have others, you will  be amazed at how relaxed you become and will probably laugh at yourself if your not at times doing it now.  Being informed is one thing, getting carried away is another.  Relax and enjoy!!
<em>ksteckler</em>'s picture
Rolling Over
by ksteckler on February 28, 2007 - 12:59pm
Ha!  I couldn't flip that baby onto her back if I wanted to --as soon as she was able to roll over, she has consistently chosen to sleep on her belly. I put her down on her back, and she rolls right onto her belly. (According to pediatricians, there's nothing you can do about it and that's OK.)
<em>trinity8</em>'s picture
Back is best
by trinity8 on February 28, 2007 - 6:24pm

I have had 5 children and ALL of mine have slept on their tummy's. I understand that it is worrying with the first baby and even I was 'worried' the first time, but then you get more relaxed with the second, third, fourth and fifth.

 

That babies shouldn't sleep on their tummy's is as far as I am concerned 'made up' and there is little evidence that it is 'dangerous'. I believe that the media is trying to 'scare' us parents.

 

When my grandaughter was born, she wouldn't sleep any other way from day one. She is now 18 months old and still sleeps on her tummy. I am glad that she does and I would encourage it, if it wasn't the case. She also has an organic mattress free of formaldehyde and she enjoys organics wherever possible. Organic is best!!

 

viola www.dare2baware.com www.shamanicjourney.com www.home-schooling-uk.com www.fun-travels.com


<em>jena_phelps</em>'s picture
tummy sleeping
by jena_phelps on February 28, 2007 - 8:37pm

I agree with letting your baby sleep on their tummies. My baby did sleep on her back for a while, but I don't think I forced her. I think that the belief of the danger of letting your baby sleep on their tummy was related to SIDS. But I found out not too long ago that there is a huge connection between SIDS and the chemicals in crib matresses. 

 

The chemicals used to fire proof the mattres can mix with a mold that grows inside the mattress and can be very dangerous to babies. The sad thing is that the United States will not recognize these findings and still make it mandatory to fire retard crib mattresses. You can find more info about this at

 http://www.healthychild.com/SIDS-crib-death-cause.htm


<em>inaiyana</em>'s picture
I UNDERSTAND
by inaiyana on March 1, 2007 - 4:05pm
<em>Vicki_R</em>'s picture
turning the head
by Vicki_R on March 1, 2007 - 4:41pm
Just make sure you turn her head from left to right.  If she continues to sleep on one side, her head will not forum properly.  That happened to my younger son.  The shape eventually came back, but why worry yourself.  I wish my pediatrician would have told me, before it happened.

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