That’s right. Water and two regular old towels are the most effective and greenest way to remove stains. I know it’s a big claim to make, but trust me, I’ve put it to the test. I have ruined plenty of shirts with stains that conventional stain removers left completely intact. As long as you can act fast and exercise a little Zen-like patience, cold water and towels can remove just about any stain you’ve got.

Most laundry stain removers on the market are petroleum-based and contain many of the same toxic chemicals as detergents. What’s more, in their attempt to be the jack of all stains, these products are often ineffective in treating some of the most common stains.

When it comes to green stain removal, there are all sorts of techniques you can try that involve various common household items such as white vinegar, hydrogen peroxide, cornstarch and eye droppers. But the first rule in stain removal is to start mild and progress from there. Luckily the mildest, easiest stain treatment method is also extremely effective on most stains — if you get to them quickly enough.

Here’s what to do:

1. Okay, you spilled. Drop everything and get thee to the bathroom. If you only find disposable paper towels there, you might want to have a talk with whoever is in charge. Not only are paper towels wasteful, they aren’t nearly as effective in getting out stains.  But the talk can wait. Now you need to focus on the stain at hand.

2. Scrape or absorb by dabbing (not rubbing) any part of the stain that hasn’t yet penetrated the fabric. A knife or cloth works well, depending on the substance. For greasy stains try cornstarch, if you can find some, to absorb the oil.

3. Grab two towels. Hold one behind the stain to absorb it and use the other to dab cold water on the front of the stain. Give this a good try. Press hard with both towels and if you see improvement stick with it. This is where the Zen-like patience comes in. Wet the towel. Press. Wet the towel. Press. Breathe deeply and just keep at it.

4. If some of the stain stubbornly remains, continue to hold the towel behind the stain and apply an ice cube to the front of the stain. Press. Breathe. Press.

5. When the stain is gone, you can let the shirt air dry or use the hand dryer in the bathroom for the ultimate in stealth — no one will ever know you spilled!

It’s so simple, but it works amazingly well. Although I’m all for preventative measures when it comes to cleaning, this is a lot more discreet than wearing a bib.