It’s nearly six months until Georgia’s birthday, but that hasn’t stopped her from making plans. Last year she knew all along she wanted a mud birthday, but this year she’s waffling.

“Mommy! This year for my birthday I want a princess party!”
I groaned internally, but if that’s really what she wants, OK. Plus I thought it was early enough that things could change, and indeed, a few days later…
“Mommy! I have a great idea! For my birthday, let’s invite everyone to a monkey party!”
I like that much better than the princess party, even though I have no idea what it entails, but before I could find out she was on to something else.
“I know! A science birthday, and we can dig up fossils in the back yard!”
I loved this one, and the backyard needs work anyway. But that, of course, was not the end.
At one point monkeys and princesses collided into a Monkey-Princess theme, and then she tossed out the idea of a party at Chuck E. Cheese. After I told her she couldn’t really have a theme at Chuck E. Cheese she dropped that (phew!), and no one idea has really stuck.

I know that she’ll eventually have some fantastic idea that takes over her mind, but I like to be prepared with some DIY suggestions to customize party games and decorations to her chosen theme, so I look to the internet for inspiration. I came across a Toddler to Teen Party Planner: Plan the perfect theme party for your kids. First, select your child's gender... A bit bothered, I chose “girl” and her age range and the list of parties looked like this: Candy Land Carnival, Princess Tea, Flower Power, Storytime Surprise, Boo!, Wakeup (the opposite of Sleepover) and Perfect Picnic. Just out of curiosity I went back and entered “Boy.” I got Super Hero, House of Rock, Carwash, Diggin’ for Dinosaurs, Firehouse Fun, Pirate, and Baseball Bonanza. As I looked through the girl parties, I noticed that most of them assume that only girls will be at the party, as if children that age do not have friends of both genders. And I guess I’m being persnickety, but considering their wording, a girl can go to a superhero or dinosaur party but not a pirate party, and a boy can’t go to a princess or garden party. Why not just have a list of ages, and a list of party ideas? Who says a little boy won’t love a book related party, or a girl doesn’t dig cars?

It’s a small thing, right? Or is it? If girls and boys are taught at four or five, in these casual, inadvertent ways, that they aren’t supposed to enjoy what the other likes, I worry that it leads to disassociation. Aren’t they a hopeful new generation, where sparkle-pink loving girls can rock out and be firefighters and sturdy, tough boys can read and garden and, if not find their inner princess, at least get their knight on with their girly gal pals? So many little girls I know have friends who are boys, and are interested in science and math and bugs. Even a little girl who loves princesses and wants to be a mommy can imagine herself as president or a scientist, or a guitar slinging baseball player. At least Georgia does -- she has no limits to what she imagines for herself. And it makes me sad that there are still insidious places where boys and girls don’t even get a chance to get along.

Photo credit: clevercupcakes