My four year old daughter Georgia and I were at a play date when she was offered some milk. She accepted, and swigged a big gulp. She made a face, glared at the offending Mommy, and asked accusingly, “Is this COW milk? I don’t LIKE cow milk!” Now, when someone asks her if she wants milk, she politely — if warily — asks, “Is it cow milk or soy milk?” I have to explain that she isn’t lactose intolerant — just generally intolerant!

Georgia has been drinking soy milk since she was weaned off breast milk at around two years old. I gave it to her because it’s what we always had around the house, and she was old enough that I wasn’t worried about allergies. I had switched to soymilk long before she was born, when, after years of drinking gallons of milk, I started feeling mistrustful of my cool, white, liquid friend. I started learning about bovine growth hormone and Monsanto, and, all of a sudden, milk just didn’t feel so wholesome. Since then, I'll use a little RBST-free cow's milk for coffee and tea and cooking now and again, but I just can't enjoy a tall glass the way I used to. We tried Georgia on cow milk from time to time, but she never took to it the way she liked the soy. I trusted that she was getting the same amount of calcium, if more added (not naturally occurring) sugar, and didn’t really think much else about it.

Until last week, when my pal "The Doctor-to-Be" told me she wasn’t giving her one year old soy milk — not because of allergies, but because her pediatrician had concerns about soy being an estrogen mimic. Naturally, I started to worry, and scurried to do some research. Thanks to the wonders of the Internet, the first story I stumbled across was an alarming exposé: the Dark Side of America's Favorite Health Food. Laden with conspiracy, hidden agendas and accusations lobbed at “soy apologists,” it made for a harrowing read. I was horrified — how could I be so stupid? Why didn’t I know any of this? Due to phytoestrogens, soy might make Georgia start menstruating sooner, and if she were a boy it could lower her sperm count. The calcium in soy milk might not be absorbed as well as dairy, so her bones could be withering away. Her thyroid could be completely out of whack.

But wait a minute! I gathered my senses, remembering how quick I am to worry when Georgia’s health is at stake. That’s why I spend 300% more on organic chicken! So while I am of the belief that we Americans are in the bad habit of championing a new nutritious ingredient only to immediately turn around and try to make some sort of salty, fried snack out of it, soy probably isn’t the demon I was ready to believe it might be. Though the "Dark Side" article did give me pause, several other dependable folks relieved my mind, including Dr. Weil, my reliable source for evenhanded information (haughtily disparaged in the Dark Side article). After absorbing their more trusted advice, I don't think soy is a ticking time bomb that will affect Georgia's fertility, and I trust her bones are growing fine. (If you read the anti-soy article, make sure you go to the responses section, where many of the author's facts are disputed.) I know from past anxiety-driven Internet searches that the web is full of articles to support my worst fears. But I try to balance those fears with instinct, and the feedback of reputable sources, doing my best to feed my family a varied, healthful diet that fits in with my environmental concerns, without getting too nuts.

My verdict? I think we can continue to enjoy our soy hot chocolate (fair trade, yum!) and tofu (well, enjoy might be too strong a word for tofu) without worry.