One of the great things about having Facebook friends across the age spectrum is finding out what's going on in other subcultures. If you're on the social networking site at all, you probably know that there are all kinds of special interest pages, but one that popped up today made me, well, sad. It's called Pretending to Text in Awkward Situations.

Nobody, at any age, is immune from awkward situations. I've had my share of tripping over my feet, blushing and feeling foolish. When I was in high school I even tried smoking cigarettes for a while, mostly because it made me feel less awkward in stressful situations.

Even today, well past graduation, I sometimes find myself anxious and flustered when, for example, I go to an event and don't know anybody. I initiate small talk in hopes of finding common ground, nibble hors d'oeuvres and try to stay engaged. But one thing that would never occur to me? Pull out my cell phone and start texting. Especially to an imaginary person!

In response to the PTAS question: "Where are places you tend to awkward text?" it seems as if nobody wants to talk to strangers. Ever.

Caleigh from Northern Indiana: "when your somewhere where you don't know anyone and you don't know how to start a conversation with anyone." (Hmm, good time to practice?)

Allison from North Jersey: "The time i usually akward text the most is when im around a bunch of people that i dont really know all that well." (And never will!)

James from North London, Ontario: "The morning after you f*ck a random." (Oooh, serious disconnect.)

Danielle, New Zealand: "when i'm by myself i pull out my phone... even if its dead.. so i don't look completely friendless hahaha" (But you never make new friends.)

Reece, Houston: "useually in waiting rooms, because otherwise its just super awekward." (Ah, that's when I dive for the trash magazine I refuse to spend money on. But that involves reading.)

Casey, Westlake HS: "when everyone else is on there phone and I am sitting there like a loser. hah." (Definitely a quandary.)

Bottom line is, there's an inability to tolerate the unease that occasionally comes with the territory of becoming an adult. When we're growing up, our parents (ideally) take the edge off every uncomfortable  situation—introduce us to the teacher, organize games in the park, make sure everybody has fun at the birthday party—allaying our anxiety and soothing our nerves. As adults, we're expected to take on that task for ourselves.

Here's something else. All those errors in grammar and usage? Copied verbatim. Either they're buying into some strange criteria for coolness that includes being dumb, or our education system is in worse shape than we think.

Finally, an articulate post:

Amber: "just want to let everybody in this forum know that you were taught how to use spelling/ grammar/ punctuation for twelve years of your life, some of you possibly still learning it. So why exactly do you all feel the need to type like massive retards? Just curious."

I don't know, Amber. Maybe somebody reading this post can answer that?

I envision a cocktail party in 20 years where everybody is standing around sipping martinis and chatting... but not with each other. They're chatting in text messages—abbreviated words about abbreviated ideas—because they haven't given themselves the time and space to master the fine art of conversation. And when they fall in love? That's a no-brainer. They'll just gaze deep into each other's text messages.

Photo courtesy of Simon Doggett

 

 

 

 

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