On the closest point to heaven atop one of San Francisco's highest hills sits the glorious Grace Cathedral, an Episcopal church that "courageously embraces innovation and open-minded conversation, where inclusion is expected and people of all faiths are welcomed." In a world where religion is used as political currency and so-called Christian precepts are displaced by judgment and exclusion, it's a refreshing exception.

The labyrinth at Grace was what drew me last Sunday. I wasn't thinking of a service but had walked the outdoor maze before, found it to be illuminating, and was eager for new insights. This time they were revealed within the church itself.

We peeked in the door and, much to our surprise, a service was just beginning. I'm a refugee from religion but couldn't resist the angelic choir voices already swirling through the nave and vibrating off the exquisite stained glass windows.

I struggled through the opening salvos of the service, but then Rev. Alan Jones began speaking. Mirabile dictu (miraculous to say), he eschewed the usual rhetoric and exhibited extraordinary common sense.

The Bible passage was about Moses parting the Red Sea, and whether or not you've ever read the Bible, I'll bet you know the story. Essentially the Israelites were being chased by the Egyptians and as they approached the water's edge, the sea was parted and they were able to walk through without even a splash. Then, so the story goes, the sea closed and swallowed the Egyptians, drowning them all.

Yikes! Hearing this story again, I'd been marveling at the inconsistencies in Christianity. Would a loving God really kill a massive number of perhaps misguided people without giving them a moment to reconsider the error of their ways, or even kiss their families goodbye? And in any event, the Egyptians were certainly convinced of the error of the Israelites, so who was really right?

I'm sure Rev. Jones made many good points, but I was so amazed at his not painting the Egyptians as evildoers and sinners that I probably missed a lot. Fortunately I can go to the website, download the sermon and take another pass at it.

Among other things, Jones said, "... the cycle of vendetta stops right here in the human heart, when we forgive and when the heart opens to the risk of love." He suggested we practice saying I am sorry, and I forgive you. Imagine if whole nations were able to do that. Would there be less war?

On the smaller scale of everyday relationships, there are another three little words that help avoid skirmishes... when I remember to use them: You are right.